It's Toyah's Lyrics We Should Be Turfing Out - Not the Cat

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BANNING news, and influential person Toyah Willcox has joined the banned-wagon calling for various things to be made illegal. The singer-turned-actress lifted her head from the sink to issue this proclamation yesterday: "If I governed this country, I would make it illegal to sell a child a violent video game, a thong, a midriff- revealing T-shirt, or anything that encourages them to get plastic surgery or to become a size zero."

This column endorses with alacrity these banning calls. But then this column is an enthusiastic supporter of most bans, which are the basis of civilisation. To that end, we are sorry to have to call also for the following lyrics by Toyah to be banned. They were penned when she was the most unauthentic-looking punk ever. She was a Marks & Spencer punk. Place a strong drink by your chair and prepare to read the following:

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It's Toyah's Lyrics We Should Be Turfing Out - Not the Cat

I'm going to be me I'm going to be free I'm going to turn this world inside out I'm going to turn suburbia upside down I'm going to walk the streets, scream and shout I'm going to crawl through the alleyways, being very loud

Tear down the wallpaper Turf...

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